Toying with Fear

Thanks to all those who had left a comment in my last entry. I hope that it did make you appreciate little little things in life and see things from my perspective.

Anyway, the episode on that 'stranger' was not over. Apparently, on friday, she hinted to my friend that a mutual 'stranger' of theirs wanted to write a letter to the Dean and to ask my friend to make a public apology or she will sue my friend for defamation. What an IDIOT. The primary intention of the statement was not to tell my friend that she is going to be sued but to strike fear in her and to intimidate her. This type of people is a menace to the society and one big word for her.. DUMB.. A very prominent public figure sued an opposition party leader for defamation for $300,000.. And that was because of a statement made publicly and spread all over the news and considering the reputation of the public figure, all he got was $300,000. I'm not saying that it is a small amount but looking at the situation, if that mutual 'stranger' were to sue my friend, she may not even succeed and if she does succeed, perhaps all she will get is peanuts. Literally.. Firstly, the remark was not made publicly and the damages on that mutual 'stranger' is not even great. Secondly, the mutual 'stranger' is not very reputable anyway so if the damages got through perhaps the damages awarded will be $1000 or $2000. And thirdly, with those amount of damages, will a rational person hire a lawyer to do so? I doubt so but perhaps that mutual 'stranger' will do so since she is already irrationale to even think of suing my friend. Some people just don't use their brains.. Perhaps they don't even have one..

So friend.. Don't worry about it.. This ordeal will only rally people around you to help you. If that dumb*&%$ is really going to sue you, then we will think about it when the action is taken.. Now no action yet so don't need to be so bother by those words.. Moreover, that 'stranger' may not even be credible in what she says so why bother?? =D

And because of this, it struck me with this topic about toying with fear. A lot of people will try to use fear to inflict damages on someone who may seem to be more harmless. I have experienced it twice over a month. One involving me and another friend and the other is the case above. The very question we'll need to ask is 'why are people doing it?' The very fact is that it works a lot of time. Words are often used to inflict fear and not action because when someone uses action to intimidate you, he can be criminally liable. However, there are also cases where words are also criminally liable. The usage of words aggressively on someone can try to sway one's decision and causes someone to be unable to live without thinking about what has been said. I hope that this entry will allow those who read to be able to try to control fear or at least to be able to recognise fear because the action of recognising something as fear can help you to better cope with your life.

Quoted from www.dictionary.com, the word fear has this meaning which is 'a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.' Most of the time, fear is not real but imagined. The following short story will show you what I meant.

According to legend, one day a man was wandering in the desert when he met Fear and Plague. They said they were on their way to a large city where they were going to kill 10,000 people. The man asked Plague if he was going to do all the work. Plague smiled and said, "No, I'll only take care of a few hundred. I'll let my friend Fear do the rest.

What was drawn by this legend?? how is the combination of fear and plague going to kill 10,000 when plague kills only a few hundred. It is all because of the fact that even for those who are not infected with the plague, the city dwellers will still eliminate those who were in contact with the ones infected with plague for the FEAR of the plague. it kills.. Doesn't it??

So what are we suppose to do when fear approaches us? Most of the time I can say that we will still be fearful of it. Even for me, when I am faced with fear, I recognise it and yet there will still be residual 'fearfulness' for the thing that causes the fear. It is natural but it is possible to reduce it by facing it. Most of the time you will discover that by recognising fear, it was not really such a big threat after all and fear does not have any special power unless you empower it by submitting to it.

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." - Franklin D. Roosevelt

The next time you are faced with fear, remember what I have written. Face your fear and to recognise that the only thing to fear about it fear itself. =D

Friendship

Something heavy for this entry..

A friend of mine was totally disappointed in one of our common 'friend' (or should I just call it a not-so-strange STRANGER). All because of the root of all evil, money.. I just don't understand how can someone actually look at money, car, condo, and all other materials in the world to be more important than something as simple as friendship.

Is it because of our society?
Is it because of our culture?
Or is it simply a norm that many of us have yet to be able to look through it?

I must say that money is important since we are living in a society that needs money for almost everything but it is very sad to see and to know that money became the ONLY thing..

Can money buy you friends? Can.. Those who will leave you when you have no money..
There were incidents where people who strike lotteries being more unhappy and not as satisfied with life as before because whoever that gets closer to him, he will assume that it was for his money. So he will end up being more wary of people around him and form a circle of protection to prevent himself from being 'robbed' of his money. Eventually? He ended up being unhappy and have lower social interaction with the society therefore increasing his probability of being suicidal. Sounds familar?

Can money buy you time? Can.. TV commercial time to air an AD for work purpose..
Why do we cry at funerals regretting that we did not spend enough time with that someone who is important in our life and when the funeral is over, we go back to our old 'programmed mode' and work like nobody's business then cry at the next funeral and regretting the same things again? Perhaps we are just a species that is very forgetful.. Perhaps..

There are many other things that money can't buy and yet we place money/ material needs over and above these priceless things. The very question to ask is 'Why?' and then evaluate on yourself to see if you are guilty of it too. If you are, you have two choices.. One is to do something about it, and the other is to continue to be guilty..

"Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything."
- Muhammad Ali

I feel that this quote is very meaningful and I'd like to share it with the rest of my friends. Friendship is not being able to meet each other everyday, call each other everyday or even think of each other everyday. Friendship is about a bonding.. It is about being there when needed and offering a listening ear whenever possible. Some people may view it as constant contact but I think it is very fake and it shows that without contact, the friendship won't last. If that is the case, then I must say that the bonding of the friendship is very very weak though it may appear to be strong with all the calling, meeting and what not.

I have a sworn brother whom I contact once in a blue moon and yet when crisis strikes him, I was one of those called to be by his side to be there with him which I did. It was just so amazing that since the day we left school, we contacted and met for less than 20 times over 6 years and yet when he needed help, I was the one who was called upon rather than those whom he is meeting everyday at work. Isn't it simply a sign that it is not constant contact that counts?

I have another person in my life who helped me and groomed me to who I am today whom I seldom meet and yet still closely bonded. He is non other than my NPCC teacher, 'cousin' cum a close friend Daniel Yong. We did not contact nor meet up often since I left NPCC and since he left Hai Sing and yet, whenever we meet up, we are still able to relate to each other very well. As he is very much older than me, he seldom confide in me but for me, when I am having problems in life, he is the 1st person who will come to my mind as I felt that he understands me the most.


I hope that most people will be able to look through the tangible stuffs and focus on things that are intangible. The priceless things are those that are intangible..

"When I find myself fading, I close my eyes and realize my friends are my energy."

Night Cycling

Nearly one week since I last blogged. School just started and five lectures went by just like that.
Tons of readings to do and I got to organise for my school's night cycling. Everything went pretty smoothly and all that we need to do is the registration for the participants and the event day itself which is this coming Friday.

So just let me update about last weekend. Went for Lycan's Chalet after my last lecture of the week. The little lycans prepared a lot of food and it was more than enough to feed a Company size of people yet it was just a section plus of people there. Had great fun with the 'Giant' singing 'Bing Yu' and the Freshies version of FATE on the 2 bdae girls. And what's even more happening is when the seniors got drunk and spouted nonsense till they left. Haha.. Me, Jian Ming and Shitnee left the chalet at 4+ to go to the airport to send Kok Sheng off. Made Ryan cry with our songs. Went back to hostel with Ryan and I reached KFH at 6am. Slept till 2pm and then packed to leave hostel at 3pm. Reached home at 5 and I fell asleep till 8. Missed Christina's farewell meet up. Sorry about that. Left at 9 to meet Cindy for night cycling recce. Recce started at 1130pm and we ended at 640am. Had breakfast till 730am then we returned the bikes. Took a cab home and I reached at 10am. Slept till 4pm before taking a cab to collect AHM race pack at Toa Payoh SAFRA and meet up with lynn for dinner at SAKAE after that. After dinner, we went back to hostel and home respectively.

A very packed weekend and I expect another packed weekend for this coming one. I wish that all my other friends out there to be happy and cheerful always. Apologies for not having time to accompany you guys as I am really busy with school stuffs. will catch up with you all when I have my vacation once again. =D

Ultimate tension of the Opposites

Should I or should I not? There are so many things now at this juncture that I will need to make decisions and they may change the way my life is going to turn out to be.

Should I take 7 modules?
Should I run for Sports Director or President?
Should I continue fencing?
Should I aim to complete in 3.5 years or 4.0 years for my uni?

This is what I like and also dislike about life. We decide our own destiny.. We decide on which path to take. We decide on what our life is going to turn out to be. So what is it installed for me? What do I need to do? If I decide to take 7, I may have to give up running for pres and perhaps drop fencing too. I need some peace.. I need some time to reflect on things here.. *ohm*

Rag and Flag Week!!

A long wait ladies and gentleman! Apologies for the long wait of my updates as this week is a really hectic week. But it was all worth it when our school won the BEST FLOAT award for three consecutive years! Well done guys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0hslQHF7fQ

Just wondering how many people know about the story of Rag and Flag for SDE. It all started with people with passion to bring up the school, bond the student and organise activities throught the club for students. We are at our 17th MC now but we were actually only 2 years old. No one heard about SDE till recent years and that is why I always consider our club as a very young club. A lot of things need to be done and a lot of room for improvement and one of the ways is to archive things that we do to reduce the learning curves of the future project directors.

2 years ago, the FOC head was John and the Rag head was Danny and that was the year when SDE sweep almost all the awards during Rag & Flag 05. That was also the year when DE Club started off. The bonding between the students made them pass it on to the following year with FOC being led by Cody and Rag by Kok Sheng. This was the FOC and Rag that I was involved in and it changed my life totally. I had a good start to my uni life and it was really great to win it for the second time consecutively and me being part of the team. Henceforth, I decided to choose to contribute to DE Club over Raffles Hall. And as the SDE spirit passes on, we had Xu Wen leading FOC and Chia Wei leading Rag and here we are at the top of the world, being crowned the champion once again for the 3rd time consecutively for Rag. It further adds on to my joy when we are a small school as compared to the rest of the faculties and we are not a force to be reckoned with. WE ARE THE BEST!

As we bask in the light of the glory, lets not forget that it is not the end but a beginning to pass on the spirit and love on to the next batch. There are still a lot of room for improvement but due to the fact that our school is small, we are able to bond everyone easily and that is the way to go. I hope that the Raggers this year will make things happen for the 4 years that they are going to be in SDE and make a difference to those that are going to enter the gates of SDE.

Academic term is going to start so I wish all those who are schooling all the best!

Last working day..

Thanks for the breakfast from Sally.
Thanks for the Lunch with Vijay, Meng Kai, Jack Pun, Jack Hong, Ee Wah, Jasline, Sally, Daen and Benjamin.
Thanks for the bear and little book from Sally.
Thanks for the photo collage from Benjamin.
Thanks for the minisafe and card from Daen.
Thanks to Teo Hong and Mike for their patience in teaching me and answering my queries.
Thanks for Sin Boon for his advices and rides to camp.
Thanks to Ganesh for helping me every now and then.

There are many more to thank for making my stay an enjoyable one especially to Daen, Sally and Benjamin. Things that we share and we do.. It made working less dreadful and that helps a lot. I dunno how would my attachment be if I had not met your guys. It will most probably be just another attachment and nothing special. Something for you guys to remember..

'Things that you want may not be what you need.
Things that you need may not be easy to get.
Things that are easy to get may not be exactly simple.
Things that are simple may not be seen with the eyes.
Things that you see may not be real.
Things that are real may not be felt with the heart.'

We will still meet up and I shall org it instead just in case Daeny Daen wanna forget me.. LOL.. Take care pals.

Am I old?

Sometimes I wonder if it is the fact that I interact with a lot of older people that I tend to think very differently from others.. I wonder if it is from those people who have walked the way ahead of me and shared their life experiences with me which enabled me to have a very different perspective of things and of life..


I believe in teaching, helping others plan their life, helping others to have a smoother transition in life, helping others to have a more gentle learning curve by sharing whatever knowledge that I have.. And yet all I get was people trying to guess what 'ill intention' do I have or what 'ulterior motive' do I have that I am so willing to share so much.. Hey.. what's so so so so so wrong about sharing and helping? What's so difficult about believing that everyone helps everyone out of kindness and not for selfish gains? Is it because nowadays we are living in a society that everything comes with a cost and everything must come with a reward or incentive before someone is willing to do nice things to others? Is technology helping us or is technology bringing the new generation further and further away from being human? just being human..


I'm pretty sadden by several things that happened these few days with things that people assume.. must I really be just be selfish to avoid having people trying to guess what other agendas do I have up my sleeves? Should I just act blur live longer? I think this mentality of people being kung-fu masters must be changed so that everyone will be happier and gain more. Kung-fu masters actually get better as they teach their disciples because they will study more into the skill before they can actually teach.. Same theory goes to studying because if we are able to teach someone something that you learnt, you will be much much better in it yourself.


Freshies who are reading this.. I just wanna say that, I am helping you guys because I think this phase of life, the transition from JC/Poly to uni is an important phase and if it is not planned and handled properly, it may disrupt your uni life which I why I am eagerly sharing what I know with you all. Some people may be enrolled into SDE alone and I want to let them at least have a senior to look for when he/she has a problem and not to be helpless. If you felt that I am too pro-active that you felt uncomfortable, please tell me. I don't like people to talk behind my back. All I want is to help you without anything in return so please don't return anything and worse still return with negative stuffs. I still love you guys as much and I'm still as warm to help, so please don't make me turn cold and just keep to myself. Be more humane and love one another. Keep friendship.. Don't break them.. Words hurts..